a girl lost, a woman found

There was once a girl that allowed people to walk all over her, she'd be the one that'd be sitting quietly when comments were made, the one that was too scared to stand up for herself, the one who was too afraid to be herself because of what other people would think. She would question her choices, her style, her plans. She'd question everything that made her who she is.

there is now a woman that can stand up and politely tell someone to take their shit attitude and leave without a second thought.

a woman who is unapologetically herself.

a woman who isn't willing to be walked all over.

a woman who wouldn't ever be afraid to say what's on her mind.

photos by Faye Fearon (IG/Portfolio) 
                                                                                      

2017 is here and I can safely say I've never been happier to see the back of a year, sorry bout it 2016, I was not a fan. I'm trying to keep the mindset that things can only get better from here, or I'm at least praying that 2017 isn't going to be as much of a bitch to us anyway. The turn of the New Year is renowned for promises we make to ourselves to change, to banish the bad habits, to be our best selves or to simply just to live a little more. I think that being yourself and being happy in who you are comes in the top 3 most important things in life, ranking in alongside wine and roast potatoes, obviously. But it's safe to say that I wasn't in that place when I was the aforementioned girl.

   

                       

I wasn't myself for so many years because I lacked confidence. The lack of confidence came from how I was treated by people in my teens. As if being a teenager isn't hard enough, throw in some foul words from your peers and it feels like the world is going to end. The words themselves were enough for me to sink back in to a shell and super glue it shut. The shell didn't break away until after maybe my first long term relationship, said shell also had a huge impact on my relationship. Obviously if you're not happy and confident in yourself, you question why this person claims to love you. They're blatantly lying and trying to make a fool out of you, cue repetitive arguments which then rip the relationship to shit. So yeah being yourself kind of plays a huge part in every inch, every second, every action in your life.

I'd like to say that being yourself is quick and easy, click your fingers and a fog spell clouds the room which clears to reveal your friends and family to the new upgraded, sparkly, authentic, you. But when you've lived in a shell made of a mere 25% you, 75% fabrication, it's not that easy, but it is 110% worth it. I can't sit here and tell you how to do that because everyones circumstances are completely different but the one factor I held key to making those steps in my life was confidence, confidence in myself, confidence that didn't need to be reinforced by others.

If your resolution is to be more yourself around others, or to take steps to be the person you want to be, hold yourself to it, don't let 2017 be another notch on calendar that passes without change. Being stuck in a place where you feel threatened to be anything but yourself is a horrible and scary place to be, no one can force you to embrace the person you really are, but when you do, you become ten times the person you thought you could ever be. You'll be confident, genuinely happy and you won't have to give a damn what other people think because you'll know that you're just doing you and if they don't like it they can stay in 2016 with the rest of the stuff we'd all, quite frankly, rather forget. 

OUTFIT DETAILS 

Dress - Zara S/O 

Boots - H&M

Tights - Topshop
Bag - Zara S/o
Watch - Abbott Lyon

photos by Faye Fearon (IG/Portfolio)