25.9.17

behind the door


I feel like growing up one of the most used phrases we hear is "one door closes, another opens". It's a message to give hope when we feel like things are falling apart and one to reassure us that everything does truly happen for a reason. From careers to relationships the same philosophy echoes..."don't forget, there's plenty more fish in the sea" it's the same message, a coming of an end but the promise of the new.














It seems to me that in some point in life we all reach the end of a corridor, a corridor we've paced for maybe many years, that we've grown comfortable in, we've hung photos on the walls of and we've filled the air with our memories. We reach the end of this corridor, we grasp the handle of the door, we hesitate. Sometimes the fear of the unknown beyond the new door doesn't rival the comfort of the life we're already living.

I turned to shut my bedroom door today and stopped, when the catch clicked in to place I thought "if I could open this door now and be immersed in to the life I truly want, what would it look like". If I could open the door and step in to a studio loft in Paris with dusky autumnal sunset tones pouring through the window, would I take a second to peer back at what I was leaving or would the door behind me simply become a memory to be fond of, a story to tell.

To leave behind comfort, is to leave behind a lot. My mum has always said "to be in a job where your happy means the world." and it does. But happiness doesn't come just from being comfortable and I think this is where many a paths are crossed because we confuse being stable and comfortable in a situation as being truly happy. We settle; we settle because we're scared to close the door on something that could provide everything we need but not necessarily what sets our heart alight. 

This is all caused by the fear of the unknown, after all if someone handed you your dream life tomorrow, there would be no hesitation.


There would not be a...

 "what if?" 
or 
"how can I?" 

It would simply be. 


The only things that lacks in the real world from that situation, when you open that new door, is the guarantee. The comfortability. The promise and stability. But it's not to say you wouldn't have those things, it's the fear of not knowing whether you will that stops us. I've seen many videos circulating Facebook, you know those inspirational ones that pop up every so often that probably end up in your saves for those days when you think you'll need them but are only left to be buried under videos of baby goats and 2012 vines. One video that has always stayed with me is one talking about fear, it's something generated by our minds, it's our minds making the maybes become the truth which then stops us from doing the things we desire.

It's fiction, it's not fact. 


If we take fear out of the equation when making decisions, it becomes blindly clear what we should do. When our heart jumps, we should be jumping with it. When the fog of doubt and worry sets in, we have to remember that there are never any guarantees in life, even when you're comfortable, things can go wrong. Wouldn't you rather things went wrong pursuing a life you loved rather than dealing with the mishaps in a life that brings "enough."

This isn't a new lesson in life, but it's one that I think a lot of us challenge on a daily basis and one that would benefit us all if we learnt it now rather than in twenty years time.

In twenty years time when you're still wondering whether the pictures on the wall in the corridor provide more "happiness" than whats waiting on the other side.

If you could open the door closest to you now and find everything you want behind it, what would you see? 

What's stopping you. 






FIND ME HERE


PHOTOS BY MICHAELA TORNARITIS / INSTAGRAM / PORTFOLIO








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